But the thing is...this blog isn't new.
It's actually been around since 2008 or 2009 when I was a first grade teacher. I named my blog Sneaker Teacher because my husband was working for a well known sports company, and consequently, I had a pretty rocking collection of sneakers. (During rainbow week, when my students learned the colors, I sported a different pair of kicks daily to match the color of the day.) My husband's job took us to Germany, where I worked as a K-12 Support Services (SPED) teacher for a year at the Franconian International School before returning to the U.S. to continue my doctoral work. When I moved back from Germany, I was reassigned as a Kindergarten teacher and joined the ranks of Kindergarten teacher bloggers. I taught Kindergarten and blogged about it for five years.
Blogging was part of my identity.
In 2012, I had my first daughter and went from a full-time Kinder teacher to a part-time Kinder teacher. Kindergarten was half-day back then so it worked out really well. In 2014, I had my second daughter and continued as a part-time Kinder teacher until the state of Oregon decided to make Kindergarten full-day state wide. Wanting to balance my teaching job with my new role as a mom of two, I wanted to continue working part-time, which didn't mesh well with the state's decision. Part-time positions are not allowed in Kindergarten, so I advocated to move into the role of English Language Development Specialist. I had gotten my ESOL endorsement along with my master's degree in SPED back when I first started teaching, so I figured why not. If it would help me stay part-time, then it was the right job for me. Unfortunately, after transitioning into the new role, my time for blogging took a hit, but something else incredible happened.
I was unaware of the true impact the new role would have (and dare I say the impact I would have).
Now that you know the condensed history of my teaching career, let's get to it...
...
I have a confession to make. I can confidently say that I am ashamed of this little piece of my history, but I'll share it anyway.
When I first moved out to Oregon and started looking for a teaching job in 2005, I actually looked up school demographics in order to apply to schools where most of the kids were White. If you know me at all, you're probably thinking that doesn't really sound like me. Yet, at the time, the White kids were all I knew. I grew up in a small town in Connecticut and we didn't have ESL or ELD programs. I can't recall anyone I went to school with who was learning English as a second language and our student population didn't have much diversity. There were very few, if any, students of color, and privilege was abundant. When I attended Villanova University, my teacher prep courses didn't really address the fact that students would not be white and privileged. Seriously. I did my student teaching in an affluent school filled with White children and when I graduated, I wanted to have a classroom just like that.
In my subsequent equity related professional development, one of the phrases I learned was "we don't know what we don't know" and that is exactly how I would attempt to excuse my intentions from that point in time. I didn't know. I didn't know the value in diversity because I had not experienced it. So, I avoided it. It's hard to even write that. But, it's the truth.
Things happen for a reason though because I didn't get hired at any of those predominantly White schools I applied to. Instead, I took a job as a Head Start Pre-school teacher in a bilingual program for migrant families. Pretty much the polar opposite of what I had been looking for. And you know what?
It changed my life.
It was that experience that made me realize how much I love working with English learners. It was that experience that made me realize there is so much to be learned from people who have lived experiences quite different from our own. It was that experience that gave me the desire to pursue an ESOL endorsement in the first place. I wanted to be sure that when I did get a job in an elementary school, I would be able to meet the needs of my ELs. But even after getting my ESOL endorsement, I still failed my English learners because I didn't believe in them. I thought I did, but looking back I realized I didn't believe in them the same way I do now. I felt bad when they couldn't do the work, so I lowered my expectations because I didn't want to hurt their feelings. I didn't correct them because I didn't want them to feel bad. I loved them. But I did them a disservice.
Looking back, I realize that we are all on the path to becoming the best educators we can be. We certainly don't start out as rockstars. We try our best with the resources we have, but we all make mistakes. So, we learn. We grow. We try something new. We make more mistakes. Ultimately, we find our place. We solidify our beliefs. We come to understand our purpose and who we are and who we need to be.
I guess my goal in reviving this blog is that I hope to be a voice that connects with teachers like my former self, teachers who are still finding their way, and also teachers who are on my page and want to continue their journey towards being the best they can be. Many of you reading this likely know me from Twitter, where I am a well known
Why?
Because of Randy.
And Saul.
Alejandra, Andrea, Enrique, Chelsea, Ernestine, Ian, Evelyn... the list goes on.
That's why.
As you read the names of my students, surely you're thinking of some of your own.
Past and present.
It's about them.
We do this for them.
So, I want to write again. I want to reflect, and discuss, and inspire.
I hope you'll join me.
